LETTERS FROM LOVE — With Special Guest Barb Morrison!

On getting out of our own way

Oh, hello!

It is so deeply good to be here with you! I have been writing, traveling, speaking, doing, going, living . . . but there is one thing that grounds me in this dizzying season of activity, and that’s YOU. Toward the end of the week I start getting excited for our upcoming communion right here in our little corner of the Internet, our virtual front porch, cafe, living room, church, or however else you like to think of this space.

And last week was extra exciting because it saw our first two real-life meet-ups! On Sunday morning, a few people gathered for coffee in New York City (big thanks to Alexii for organizing) and on Thursday, for the first time, I got to meet some of you at my event in San Diego (AND I got this fabulous sweatshirt from K. Alexander)!

As I said in the chat a few days ago, I am relishing the thought of connecting with you in person in the months and years to come, at events all over the world. But knowing that you all are beginning to meet one another? That feels even more sacred to me. What a sweet and supportive ecosystem you all are building here!

Speaking of special people, my guest today is the talented songwriter and record producer Barb Morrison, a much-loved friend who came into my life when Rayya did. Barb is also the author of the book BOTTOMING FOR GOD: A Story About Gender Euphoria, Sobriety, Old Skool NYC, True Love, Past Lives, and Coming Home. As you’ll hear in my video, our relationship hasn’t always been easy. But I am proud to know and love them, and myself, more deeply than I did years ago (thanks in no small part to the radical self-acceptance, the ability to make peace with oneself and with one’s people, that comes through this daily practice of letter writing).

Thanks to Barb for their openness and authenticity — this letter is spectacular — and welcome to all newcomers. Let’s keep meeting on the page, in person, through our letters, through music, however we can!

Dear Love, what would you have me know today about getting out of my own way?

Oh little feather, maybe don’t be in such a hurry to not exist, can we just start with that? Ever since you first heard about non-duality 25 years ago, you’ve been trying to achieve it, like the good little Eagle Scout you are. You just can’t wait to dissolve, can you? You can’t wait to achieve that “blending into oneness with everything” badge, can you?

I think the problem here is that what you think it means to get out of the way is that you must completely erase yourself. And that is not true. Why would I want that? And why would Creation have gone through all the trouble to create you in such a unique form, if we wanted you erased? Where’s the fun in that? We like you this way, dear heart. We like you the way you are, in the form you have taken — the thoughts and ideas you have. Trust us. We like you this way.

My love, what if I told you that your desperate eagerness to dissolve your ego is the very thing that is preventing your ego from dissolving? I know, I know: it’s a paradox, but you’ve read enough books about spirituality to know that paradox is always present on the path to awakening. You already know that you can’t find inner peace by pursuing it, but that you also kind of have to pursue it in order to find it. Isn’t that an amusing puzzle? We think so!

My darling, what if the answer is not to get out of your own way, or to let me disappear into you— but rather just to stay right where you are and continue collaborating with me? What if our job now is just to make beautiful things and experiences together — blending your intelligence and mine? That’s always when we have the most fun, isn’t it?

This idea of wisdom is attainable to you, my love, because you already practice it all the time with your writing: you show up, you put in the hours, you do the hard work, and then somewhere along the way you notice that you are no longer in the room, and that something else is doing the writing now — that you have become the passenger of your own story.

Well there you go, my sweet little morsel. That’s how it works. Do that. Do that with your life, too, in all areas.

Don’t try to dissolve or disappear; just show up as yourself, with an open mind and a ready heart, prepared to meet with curiosity whatever arises next.

Don’t be afraid to work hard, but try alternating between working very hard and letting go; between doing it all yourself and letting me do it; between using your own voice and letting my voice speak through you — and then allow that alternating power of your will and my love to create the energy, the battery, that will carry you through this journey with verve, with vividness, with delight.

That’s all for today, little seeker. Just remember: don’t be afraid to stay who you are and what you are — that’s how the universe likes you.

Just bring me with you, wherever you go.

Love,

Love

Prompt

As always, if you would like to keep things simple, you can use the standard prompt for your letter from unconditional love. Just open up a notebook and write at the top of the page: “Dear Love, what would you have me know today?” And then write the answer. It really is that simple. What would unconditional love want you to know today, if it could speak to you?

Or, as we’ve been experimenting more in the last few weeks with asking for specific guidance, you may choose to ask this question: “Dear Love, what would you have me know today about getting out of my own way?”

I can’t wait to read your letters!